Hypersexuality, also referred to as erotomania , or, more straightforwardly, sexual addiction, has been linked to traumatic experiences during the sufferer’s childhood. This does not imply, of course, that all those who suffer childhood trauma will go on to become hypersexual in adulthood, nor that there aren’t other causes (there are – such as some neurological conditions which it is unnecessary for me to go into here).
Erotomania can be defined as a persistent and enduring, intensely powerful compulsion to indulge in sexual activity, whether that activity be solitary or with another/ others. Although it affects females (in such cases, yet another term is sometimes used – ‘nymphomania’) it is more common amongst men. Clearly, it is no easy task to judge when a ‘normal’ sexual appetite escalates to such extremes that it is classified as erotomania ; nevertheless, clinicians generally classify sexual addiction as being a pathological condition when it substantially interferes with day-to-day functioning, including friendships, relationships, work and life-style in general. DISSOCIATION : Clinicians regard addiction to sex as a coping mechanism which allows the sufferer to ‘dissociate’ (click here for my article explaining in detail what psychologists mean by ‘dissociation) or, in other words, to mentally ‘escape’ from feelings of intense emotional distress (including clinical depression, severe anxiety and intense loneliness brought about by social isolation). SYMPTOMS : Symptoms include – – frequent, anonymous sex – frequent use of prostitutes – obsession with online porn/sexually oriented chatrooms/phone sex – view of others as mere sex-objects – obsessive masturbation (can be even as much as 10-20 times per day) and, at the more severe end of the scale, symptoms may include : – indecent public exposure – voyeurism – bestiality ROLE OF CHILDHOOD TRAUMA IN THE DEVELOPMENT OF EROTOMANIA : Severe childhood trauma, as we have seen so often in other articles I’ve written for this site, often causes the adult who experienced it to develop conditions that give rise to deep-rooted psychological and emotional distress. Erotomania may then result as a defense mechanism (ie the need to dissociate as discussed briefly above). Not infrequently, drink and/or drugs may be used during sexual activity in order to intensify its dissociating effect. EFFECTS AND TREATMENT : Whilst the sexual activity associated with erotomania may bring temporary relief from emotional pain and suffering, this tends to be heavily outweighed by the negative effects of sexual addiction. This can be illustrated, in part, by the diagram shown below : 
The diagram shows the cycle of emotions, feelings and behaviour that frequently develops in those who suffer from sexual addiction. As can be seen, the end result is despair, and then the cycle starts again. (What the diagram misses out, however, is the fact that compulsive sexual behaviour is particularly likely to occur if there has been a stressful ‘triggering event’). The first port of call for the sufferer of erotomania is usually the GP (in the UK). However, because of the sensitive nature of the subject some prefer to initially see an expert in sexual therapy.
SEX THERAPY
As we saw above, one reason why those who have suffered childhood trauma may become addicted to sex is that the act of sex helps them to ‘blot out’, or make themselves feel ‘numb to’, or ‘dissociate’ from unbearable emotional pain connected to their early life experiences (for example, those who have suffered severe childhood trauma may go on to develop borderline personality disorder and a major symptom of this condition is a propensity to develop addictions – including sex addiction). Indeed, because most people who suffer from sex addiction are generally unwilling to discuss their problem with others, the fact that they are suffering from it only becomes apparent when then develop a trusting relationship with a therapist who they initially went to see for help with other addictions such as alcoholism or drug abuse. Alternatively, they may have initially gone to see the their therapist in order to seek treatment for depression, anxiety or low self-esteem (all of which are also more common in those with a history of childhood trauma). Currently, sexual addiction is regarded as being similar in nature to addiction to chemical substances because the act of sex seems to have a similar ‘numbing’ effect (see above) on feelings of mental anguish (however, it should be noted that, as a discrete condition, ‘sex addiction’ is not yet (at the time of writing) included in the Diagnostic And Statistical Manual Of Mental Disorders. Sexual addiction can manifest itself in a number of ways, including :
- Voyeurism
- Exhibitionism
- Fantasies
- Internet Pornography
- Sadomasochism
- Compulsive use of prostitutes
In fact, sexual addiction is NOT the same as simply having a high sex drive (indeed, a high sex drive can be a sign of good psychological health) but involves a compulsive quality that brings about negative results (for the sufferer, those s/he comes into contact with, or both). Sexual addiction can seriously, adversely impact upon the individual’s quality of life. For example, it may :
- cause financial problems
- result in the spreading of sexually transmitted diseases
- lead to legal problems
- impair relationships
Once a person suffering from sex addiction recognizes that s/he has a problem which is significantly spoiling his/her quality of life, seeking help from a therapist can be very helpful. Confiding in a trusted, accepting, empathetic therapist can help to reduce feelings of shame related to the addiction and the therapist can provide advice about how to avoid triggers and how to develop healthier and more functional coping mechanisms to deal with negative feelings. Therapies used to treat sex addiction include cognitive behavioral therapy and psychodynamic therapy (the latter may be more appropriate when the problem is clearly related to childhood issues).
RESOURCES :
How to Overcome Sexual Addiction | Self Hypnosis Downloads
Stop Sex Obsession Pack | Self Hypnosis Downloads
Overcome Porn Addiction With Hypnosis | Self Hypnosis Downloads
David Hosier BSc Hons; MSc; PGDE(FAHE). David Hosier BSc Hons; MSc; PGDE(FAHE).
