Narcissistic Parents’ Use Of The Complimentary Moral Defense

        Having lived with my highly unstable mother until since my parents’ divorce when I was eight, I moved into the house of my father and step-mother (I have explained how this came about elsewhere on this site) when I was thirteen. It was obvious from the start that I was not …

5 Defenses Used By Narcissists To Hide Inner, Extreme Fragility

      Despite superficial indicators of the polar opposite, internally narcissists are wracked by intense feelings of self-doubt, inadequacy, vulnerability, fragility, worthlessness and self-loathing; in essence, their internal, camouflaged self is that of a highly anxious, uncertain, frightened and deeply insecure child. And, because it is so painful to live in a state of …

8 Dysfunctional Roles Within The Dysfunctional Family

Within dysfunctional families, according to various psychologists (e.g. Wegscheider-Cruse and Kellogg), each family member develops a dysfunctional role. The number of roles, and how they are defined, varies somewhat but eight roles, representative of those so far proposed, are as follows: THE ENABLER THE DO-ER THE HERO THE MASCOT THE LOST CHILD / LONER THE …

3 Types Of Childhood Stress : Positive, Tolerable And Toxic

  Stress can be defined as ‘a state of mental or emotional strain or tension resulting from adverse or demanding circumstances’ and is, of course, an inevitable part of life. Whilst we often complain about stress due to the fact that too much of it can have damaging or even catastrophic effects upon our wellbeing, …

Childhood Trauma Linked To Agoraphobia

The term agoraphobia derives from the Greek word ‘agora’ which translates as ‘open place’ or ‘market place’ so ‘agoraphobia’, in literal terms (as opposed to clinical terms) means fear of ‘open places’ or ‘fear of the market place.’ Agoraphobia is listed by DSM-5 (The Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition – sometimes …

Children Don’t Complain Of Anxiety – They Say Their Stomach Hurts.

N.B. Never assume a physical complaint such as a stomach ache is brought on by stress. Always seek the opinion of an appropriately qualified medical professional. A study conducted by Columbia University (Callaghan and Tottenham, 2019) has compared two groups of children : Children who had experienced DISRUPTED EARLY CAREGIVING (they had been adopted as …

How Bullying May Affect Teenagers’ Brains

A study conducted by Quinlan et al. (2018) on the effects of bullying on the brain and involving the study of 682 teenagers required these young people to fill out questionnaires about the extent to which they experienced bullying. The study ran over a number of years (i.e. it was a longitudinal study) and each …

Being Traumatized ‘Like Having Foot On Brake And Gas At Same Time.’

The traumatized state has been likened to the effects of the simultaneous depression of both a car’s gas pedal (accelerator) and brake. I explain why below : Our physiological state of arousal is determined by the interplay between our sympathetic and parasympathetic nervous systems and these two systems have the following functions : THE SYMPATHETIC …

Childhood Trauma Can Make Us Terrified Of Accepting Love In Adulthood.

    It is well documented that severe and protracted childhood trauma greatly increases our risk of experiencing relationship difficulties in our adult lives. In some cases, this can result in fear, or even terror, of close, loving relationships in our adult lives. Many reasons have been put forward in an attempt to explain this …

Reasons Why ADHD Might Be Being Overdiagnosed

      How Many Young People Are Diagnosed With ADHD? Statistics reveal around 1 in 7 young people in the United States currently receives a diagnosis of ADHD (the majority of whom are male)) and it is has been argued by many that a large proportion of these diagnoses are incorrect; in fact, it …

ADHD And Its Link To Childhood Trauma And A Negative Thinking Bias

  Childhood Trauma, Stress And ADHD: There is increasing evidence derived from research studies that ADHD is linked to psychosocial stress, particularly childhood trauma which has been established as a major factor putting the child at increased risk of developing ADHD (e.g. Stevens et al., 2007). Indeed, there is a growing school of thought expressing …

Which Factors Of The ‘5 Factor Model Of Personality’ Predict BPD?

    The diagnosis of borderline personality disorder (BPD) is predicated upon the notion that those who suffer from it have aspects of their personalities which are problematic, self-defeating and dysfunctional so, in the first instance, it is useful to explain what is meant by personality. In fact, there are several theories which attempt to …

Why Childhood Trauma Sufferers Can’t ‘Just Get Over It.’

If we have been unfortunate enough to have suffered severe and protracted childhood trauma and have, as a result, developed emotional and behavioural problems (which, in some cases may have led to diagnoses of borderline personality disorder or complex posttraumatic stress disorder) it is, to put it mildly,’ most unhelpful to be told or expected …